One of the many wonderful nurses at the NICU made a scrap book style poster for RT to hang on the wall above his incubator. It has his name, birth weight,  length,  time,  and date of birth.  It is too cute. I could not be any more happy with the amount of love these nurses have for RT.

Thank you nurses for doing an amazing job, and helping us through this difficult time!

We check out of the parent sleep rooms today.  It’s amazing how much stuff we have amassed over the last 5 days in the hospital. Our rental hospital grade breast pump, all the supplies that acompany that. Clothes, discharge papers, perscriptions and more.

We manage to just barely carry everything out to the car in one load. It feels like we have forgotten something in the hospital… . someone in the hospital. A horrible sensation washes over us as if we have lost our son. Our back seat is empty. Where there should be an infant strapped into his carseat, there is nothing.  It feels empty.  Last August I remember a simular feeling but last August was filled with more sadness.

Hopefully in 18 weeks we will be driving away from here with a very different feeling.

I gather my wits for a moment and push everything else from my mind. I back out of the parking space and focus on my driving.
1934 RT tolerated his blood transfusion again today.  They are not allowed to feed during tansfusion or for 6 hours after.  He won’t get food till around 0200 on the 26th. They are going to remove his UAC (umbilical artery catheter) and install a PICC line which is essentially a IV that can remain in for a long period of time. I won’t be allowed to be there for this procedure they have to do it in a “clean room” type environment to help decrease the chance of infection.  Then they have to do an x-ray to ensure it was placed properly.

I ask them to call when it is completed.

July 26 0045 I recieve a call, the procedure worked but took 3 attempts to get the correct placement.  They gave him some fentanol to help keep him relaxed during the procedure,  he still wanted to see what the hell they were doing to him shop he tried opening his eyes again.  He managed to open both eyes just a little bit left eye is able to open wider. The right is still partially fused shut.

Time to pump again.

I feel like adults close their eyes to try and shut everything out.

Babies try and keep their eyes open to gather more information.

Keep learning RT!

I will see you soon
I’ll be waiting at the other end
Take your time coming through
You will never have to do this again
I will show you all
Lessons I’ve learned will have to guide
I’ll come running when you call

But for now, just stay inside

-Anticipate by  Skream