We discuss names which we had not done yet, in hopes of having to make a decision till later on, almost like it would have been bad luck to do it any sooner. We decide upon the perfect name for our son as if it was meat to be. Wife starts getting nauseous and shaking. I hold her hand and we focus on breathing 1,2,3 in 3,2,1 out.  Things are happening quick.

Dr. and OB show up almost out of nowhere and call NICU. Room fills with people 2,4,6 surround mom. Momma vomits in a bag. Water breaks and two contractions later baby is almost in the air Dr. won’t let baby come out till NICU team arrives, she warns us it may seem she isn’t doing much once he comes out, she will him rest for 30 seconds before cutting the cord, this is to help baby get more blood and help his ltitle brain. He sure came out in a hurry.

0712 Baby enters our world. NICU team arrives a minute later I count 8,10,12 people and they immediately get to work on baby the 6 of them urgently mooving, but functioning fluidly like an symbiotic organism, keeping baby alive, each performing a different function but working together. They hook up various monitors to his tiny body. They intubate for mechanical ventilator to help him breathe.

I try and stay out of the way and see everything that is going on. There are blood droplets on the floor between where mom lays being taken care of  and babys team is.

A nurse asks if I am the father.

I AM A FATHER! A proud father!

A scared father. I am excited to be a father but so scared about how many complications can happen over the next 18 weeks. I sorry we couldn’t have keep you in longer.

What a crazy Rollercoaster of complicated conflicting emotions.

I am scared but have faith our boy will make it.